Dirty Work

Last night I dreamt I was following around a beautiful woman, and we snuck into an apartment floating in the sky. She stripped naked, and I was really excited, until suddenly she started setting fire to the apartment, and I was scared and confused. We fled, and I saw my friend Betsy there. Later my roommate Nick and I had a man held hostage, and we had to kill him. We hemmed and hawed, starting to strangle him and then stopping, thinking that maybe we could let him go and it would be okay. Then Nick tossed me a towel and said, "It's time." And he started to smother the man with his own towel, and I had to hold his feet down with my towel. The man was bleeding everywhere. And then I woke up.

Class Project

Last night I dreamt I was back in public school, and I had been tasked with organizing some papers at the back of the room. All of a sudden I felt my bowels clench up, and I knew I was about to be sick. I tried to think of how I could surreptitiously sneak off to the bathroom when my bowels let go and I shit myself. I was wearing shorts and everyone noticed instantly. My best friend Jimmy was there and mocked me horribly. I knew that no one would ever forget this, and I would always be ridiculed for it. I got out of the classroom and saw one of the kids who had been making fun of me. I smacked him in the face and his head slammed into the wall. I felt instant remorse and apologized. "I'm sorry. I was really angry at you, but I shouldn't have done that." And then I woke up.